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Biker Does the Narrows

Our very best favorite bad-boy-biker piece. The little insets give credibility to this otherwise un-credible article. We've not run across anyone yet who didn't believe this without question. Did you know that Elvis is one of our writers? Wanna buy some cheap land in Florida? (that was a joke---don't get any ideas)


Article Text Below, Feel free to copy and make changes to the story you submit to us. 

 Risky Business 

Local Daredevil Pits Skills Against Bridge

"I've done a lot of crazy things," said Ault. "But this is one I won't repeat."


Yourtown---- (NOTICE: Any names of towns, locations, people, institutions, etc., used in these sample fake newspaper stories, are purely fictional, chosen at random, and are not meant to portray or represent any real person, place or deed. Remember that no matter what name a writer chooses to use in any fictional story, there is a real person (or many persons) SOMEWHERE who have that exact name.)

A Hoodsport man, Ron Ault, has tackled the Tacoma Narrows Bridge, and won---sort of.

Ault added the Tacoma Narrows Bridge to his growing list of accomplishments(?) this weekend, when he rode an off-road motorcycle up one of the cable stays that support the bridge. He used no safety lines. Getting down, however, proved to be a bit too much.

"You can say I beat the bridge," said Ault, "And you can also say the bridge beat me."

Ault's bike was lifted up to the small walkway that ascends the cable stay by half a dozen strong friends. Then he rode straight to the top without stopping.

"I got the bike turned around at the top without too much trouble," he said. "But, to be perfectly honest, the ride up there bugged me a little bit. I sat there looking at that long hill down, and I just sort of choked."

Ault was helped back to the bridge deck by local firefighters and rescue personnel.

"The guy really did it all himself," said John Burger, rescue coordinator. "We stayed with him all the way down though. We made him put on a safety harness, and we relayed the safety cables past all the handrail stanchions. It was pretty good practice for us."

Ault was promptly arrested on the car deck, and his motorcycle was impounded.

A spokesperson for the Pierce County Sheriff's office was quoted as saying, "This (expletive expletive) has got to stop!"

See Tacoma's New Narrows Bridge Page D-4


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Whole Size is a two-sheet, eight-page WHOLE newspaper WITH HEADLINE
Poster Size is HUGE, printed on stiffer poster stock; one page WITH HEADLINE
Small Size is SMALL -- roughly a 6 x 9 inch "Pocket Clipping" with NO HEADLINE 
Tabloid is tabloid sized, smaller than the Enquirer; one sheet, two pages each WITH HEADLINE
Full size is one full page, NOT one full SHEET; it's an INSIDE half-sheet page with NO HEADLINE