Leave it where the secretaries will find it. We know people who've had the entire company going for months. Copies get sent to the corporate office back east, the big-wigs call out to see if you need more security.... Send us a pic of your workplace. We'll drop in the bear.
Article Text Below, Feel free to copy and make changes to the story you submit to us.
Local businesses visited by carnivorous patron.
Bear Finds Way to Fife
Police, Fire, Animal Control Units Respond
Yourtown---- (NOTICE: Any names of towns, locations, people, institutions, etc., used in these sample fake newspaper stories, are purely fictional, chosen at random, and are not meant to portray or represent any real person, place or deed. Remember that no matter what name a writer chooses to use in any fictional story, there is a real person (or many persons) SOMEWHERE who have that exact name.)
A young bear found its way into the Fife industrial area this morning, and was cornered by law enforcement and animal control officials.
"The animal just wandered around looking at things," commented a county animal control executive. Apparently the bear was observed shaking locked doors in the area, and using his considerable weight to try to push the doors inward.
"It's highly unusual for a bear to make it all the way into inhabited areas like this," said another animal control employee. "Of course there are bears outside of town, but I can't see this animal making it all the way over here unnoticed. Someone would have called it in."
No zoo in the area reported any missing animals, and animal control personnel suggested that the bear appeared to have been living in the wild, as opposed to having come from a zoo.
Police set up a perimeter while animal control distracted the animal long enough for a zoo veterinarian to dart it. The bear did not immediately 'go to sleep' however, and spectators were kept out of the area until it was cleared sometime after 7 a.m..
"We try to never be surprised," said one man from animal control. "But sometimes we are."
The bear was loaded into a truck, given a complete physical, and taken to an undisclosed location.
"This bear won't have to be put down," said Earl Wanker, an associate at the Zoo. "He maintained his manners and didn't eat anybody. He was just curious---and maybe hungry. He'll be introduced back into the wild."
Residents and business owners should sleep a little better tonight, knowing that.
See WILD ANIMALS Page D-5
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